My ancient lawn mower gave up the ghost last fall and I am in the market for a new one. I’ve been browsing Lowe’s, Amazon, and Home Depot for the best in my price range. The customer ratings have me baffled.
The four and five star ratings say things like ‘This is the world’s best lawn mower’. I actually saw one that said that. The one star ratings say stuff like ‘This mower was designed by Satan himself and it was made by his henchmen. It is demon possessed’. There are few two and three star reviews.
I know what’s going on here. It’s Starbucks. A little bit of Starbucks, of caffeine and sugar, and suddenly the world is all rainbows and unicorns and you have the best lawn mower in the world and you want to sing along with the Fifth Dimension.
A little more Starbucks and the world is full of idiots and and you want to tie dynamite to your mower and blow it up and the music in your head is head banging guitar destroying acid rock. I would post an example of that but I don’t have a clue who to look for.
So I now I know. The reviews, good or bad, are not to be trusted. Which mower should I buy? I think I’ll go with the pretty red one.
By the way, if you are thinking about posting one of those reviews, please, don’t do it while under the influence of Starbucks.
From a Far Country 
We get Starbucks every Friday. I will refrain from writing reviews on Fridays.
The Good Wife